Image Map

Human Kitten

by Human Kitten

/
1.
02:06
2.
3.
01:15
4.
02:50
5.
01:55
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
00:53
11.
12.
13.
02:16
14.
02:02

credits

released March 16, 2013

Additional Vocals:
Dan Faughnder (Sledding with Tigers)
&
Nick Wuebben (Just Nick)

Cover Photo by Annie Velenovsky (www.annievelenovsky.com)

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Human Kitten Tucson, Arizona

acoustic songs about isolation, crisis, pain, growth, & learning to be alive after years of anticipating death

contact / help

Contact Human Kitten

Streaming and
Download help

Shipping and returns

Redeem code

Track Name: It's Cool
I don’t want to be right, I want to be happy
I don’t want to be sad, I wanna be sappy
I wanna cry to romantic comedies
I want to watch stupid action movies

And if there is a god upstairs, well I bet he likes us
Cause we’re good, we’re good, it’s cool, it’s cool
I say to myself as I stuff my face with food
Stuff my face with food
Stuff my face with food

And there is always so much conflict, I don’t get it
I guess I just don’t really hate everything as much as you do, I’m sorry dude
You’re consumed with getting the last word and proving yourself true
That’s not happiness, that’s just pleasure, please don’t confuse the two
Don’t confuse the two
Please don’t confuse the two
Please don't confuse the two
Track Name: Detroit Social Work
I wish I had a reason for feeling how I feel
I wish there was a purpose or a meaning or something
I wish that when I did feel great, it lasted more than just a day
And I didn’t go straight back to feeling miserable
And the part of brain that functions wrong, well I can’t articulate it into a song
But the day that it happens, I will retire from music

And your mind is like a town with next to no funding
No public education, garbage dumps, or policemen
So your trash piles up all the way to the treetops
And for the life of you, you just can’t get that smell out of your mouth
So you try and you try, you think you might die
You swim through the wasteland, vomiting and crying
Just to make it, just to make it, just to make it to the welfare department
Track Name: Columbus Day
I am not a man, I'm a venue for anger and sadness
Stuck inside a land of concrete roads and 7/11s
Buying things won’t make us happy
Consumer culture will make us feel crappy
About ourselves and our skewed senses of beauty

And our dissatisfaction stems from a history of compliance
Men and women buying the things that they don’t need at inflated prices
In a terribly futile search for half-priced happiness
Track Name: I Kinda Suck
I always say nothing when I, I should have said something
I always say nothing when I, I should have said something
Cause I couldn’t think of the right thing to say
No, I can never think of the right thing to say

I spend most of my days paralyzed by
Fear, shame and anxieties
Am I doing it right? Probably not. I’m probably not
But I’ll be damned if I’m not trying

Depression is my oppression and it trumps all the rest
I’d be content to die right now if I knew I wouldn’t be missed
But I know I’d be missed
At least I know I’d be missed

I’m terrified of all the kids I went to high school with
I’m scared of what they think of me now
Do they respect me? Do they like me? Do they hate me? Do they spite me?
They probably just don’t think of me at all, they don’t think of me at all

And I know I should care more about
How I think and feel about myself
But I just want to serve and I don’t want to serve myself
Cause I’m a lost cause and you are a lego box

So tell me what to do and I will appease you
I just want to please you, I just want to please you
I just want to please you, I just want to please you
I just want to please you, I just want to please you
Because if I can’t be happy, at least you can be
Since I can’t be happy, will you please be?
Track Name: I'm Sorry
Change the things you hate or change the way you feel
Complaining is fucking worthless, but I totally understand the appeal
Every small trace of sexism in me is the direct result of insecurity
I’m trying to be better, trying to understand the plight of others and the scars on their hands

But I know I’ll never be good enough for you
Yes, I know I’ll never be good enough for you
And I know, to you, I am weak
But I know that I am not weak
So I’ll try to prove myself, I am not a wimp
I am not a wimp

So I’ll scream to a room full of strangers all my deepest darkest secrets
And I assure you, my lyrics aren’t a joke, yes I really do believe this
That by the end of the show, by the end of the show, by the end of the show, by the end of the show
You'll know more about me than my friends and family
And that’s all my fault
Track Name: Raison d'être
I’m afraid to write about bands that I like
For a fear of seeming that I am appealing to a fanbase that I
Would like to belong to, would like to report to
And at the end of day, I wouldn’t feel ashamed of knowing I was playing a dirty game
No, that’s not me, I don’t really care what you think
Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, no, fuck me
I’m sorry, it’s just the mood swings, it’s taken years and years
Of in-depth testing to find that my brain don’t quite work properly
And I’m sorry to everyone and everything
For my disability in doing normal people things
Like talk on the phone, or go outside
Or maintain friendships, get a job, or the simple task: to be alive
And in the context of society, I’m coming to terms
With the fact that I, the fact that I, the fact that I
Just might be worth nothing
Track Name: Chinese Food (Interlude)
All I eat is chinese food and pizza delivery
All I eat is chinese food and pizza delivery
And I’m way too fucking poor to keep on living this way
All I eat is chinese food and pizza delivery
And I’m so fucking sad
Track Name: I Don't Want To Be Sad
I’m always so lonely, frustrated, and angry
And I never know if it’s my fault
Or if it’s just my brain working fucking wrong
Cause I have got problems that I cannot withhold
Cause I have got diseases that I cannot control

And my feelings are at the mercy of my chemical imbalances
And I’m trapped inside the torture of living with bipolar disorder

And I always hate myself more than I hate anyone else
I’ll always hate myself before I hate anyone else
Cause I know I have earned it
From years and years of treating myself like shit

And I want to believe that it’s not my fault
And I want to believe that I can live a fulfilling life
But I might not
I might not
Track Name: Space Princess
I was supposed to be a missed carriage but the princess was on time
I was supposed to be aborted, but the spaceship was in line
But I survived, my brain survived
And my heart it survived, I can’t believe I survived

There was a civil war in debate class, not over owning human beings
There’s nothing civil about war, what you’re saying’s not what it means
Your self righteous common sense doesn’t make any sense
Just because you love the government doesn’t mean that you sense
In fact it means the opposite
In fact it means the opposite
In fact it means the opposite

When I was fifteen, I was diagnosed
With an anxiety disorder and depression I suppose
My neurons are all fucked up and it’s hard to get a job
But I guess it’s better than being a cultural amorphous blob
You think that you’re normal, but that doesn’t mean that you’re sane
You think that you’re normal, but that doesn’t mean that you’re sane
In fact it means you’re insane
In fact it means you’re insane
In fact it means you’re insane

I was supposed to be a missed carriage but the princess was on time
I was supposed to be aborted but the spaceship was in line
But I survived, my brain survived
And my heart it survived, I can’t believe I survived
Growing up
Track Name: Me
It’s great if you’re fat and it’s great if you’re skinny
And it’s great if you're black, white, blue, green or grey
And it’s great if you’re a homosexual alcoholic slut
And it’s great if you’re straight, sober, and celibate
As long as you believe there’s love in your fellow mans’ hands
And you give them the respect that you expect in this land
It always takes two parties to have an argument
And whomever was right, well it came and it went
Your negativity is within your control
A positive life doesn’t mean having a hand to hold
It means taking responsibility for your actions and your feelings
And one day you can become a mature human being
And I still love you even if you don’t agree with me
Because you’re a human being with your own unique vision of what is “me.”
Track Name: Young Adult Fantasy
Please stop reading all of those young adult novels
Like Looking for Alaska or the Perks of Being a Wallflower
There’s more to life than romance and butterflies
But you'll never learn if you keep on taking advice from 15 year old guys

Don’t make it seem poetic that you met a boy back in high school
And he was so sweet and cool that you wish you were not 22
You’re living in the past, that boy is working at a grocery store
While you work on your PhD in Sociology

And everything you’d thought you’d learned
Was a misreading of terms
And now we’re anchored to illogical thoughts
We’ll always be 13 at heart
We’ll always be 13 at heart
We’ll always be 13 at heart
At least until we start reading Hemingway
Track Name: Hearing Lemuria for the Second Time
The now is never enough, the past was always the best
The now is never enough, the past was always the best
I’ll never feel satisfied, I’ll never feel satisfied
I’ll never feel satisfied, I’ll never feel satisfied

I’ve got this seasick pit in my stomach where my old friends live
They make sure to remind me of all the things that I forgot to appreciate at the time
Like the long hugs, the short hugs, the long walks, the kisses on the cheek, the respect, and the mutual love
I forgot how much I needed the genuine discussions about life, love, and vulnerability

I liked my girlfriends more after we dated than when we dated
Well maybe I’m a dick, I don’t know, I was in high school, isn’t that when I’m supposed to learn?
From my mistakes, my many, many, many mistakes

I smell the smells I smelt in Chicago, perfume and the cigarette smoke
I smell the smells I smelt in Chicago, the booze and the cigarette smoke
I know that perfume, I swear I do
I know that perfume, I swear I do
And my cigarette goes out

You leave, they leave, you leave, they leave
You leave, they leave, you leave, they leave
You leave, they leave, you leave, they leave
You leave, they leave, you leave, they leave
You leave, they leave, you leave, they leave, and you just stop talking
You leave, they leave, you leave, they leave, but not from your memories
Track Name: New Years
Half of the time I’m normal, half of the time I’m too crazy to function
Half of the time I’m straight edge, the other half I’m a raging alcoholic

I’m either the life of the party or not speaking at all
I’m in love or disinterested, infatuated or indifferent
There’s no in between
I feel like I have nothing, I feel like I have everything I need

When people say you should “be yourself” they’re lying
When people say you should “be yourself” they’re lying

They want you to be normal in a vaguely quirky way
They want you to be normal every single day
They meant different like nerdy kids in high school movies
Not transexual, mentally unstable, or autistic
Because one day someone said we should all just pretend
Because one day someone said we should all just pretend

When people say you should “be yourself” they’re lying
Track Name: The End
When I was 15, I was nothing, I was stupid and angry
When I was 18, I was blinded, I was drunken and lazy
But now I’m 19, and then I’ll be 20 and I will be king of everything

And I’ve been sad for most of my life, I’ll probably be sad tomorrow
I don’t like getting drunk, whenever I’m drunk, I feel the same, but a little more dumb
But I’ll probably keep getting drunk
When I say I'm fine, I’m surely not, I just don’t have a reason why
I’m just not fine
I write these songs to give my pain a name, to hide my shame, but I feel so lame.
I write these songs to give my pain a name, to hide my shame, but it always ends
Hey, well, it always ends

I’m not in love, I don’t believe in love, but I believe in her
She was a different kind and at another time, she could've changed my mind,
But the past is gone, and just like this song,
Hey, well, it always ends