1. |
To See
00:51
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I see the Celtics on the TV set at the bar
I see you're holding on hope now
Are you moving forward? Or are you moving back?
Latching onto everything you'd ever thought the world lacked
But I gotta leave, I'm just picking up a delivery
Sorry, I gotta go, but I'm so glad hope is a thing that you hold
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2. |
The Horses of Disaster
01:33
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Burn it down into a powder
And use that to fuel your No Hope
This is a world built on deception
Each and every ego finds a way to justify its action
There is no escape
From the lies that people tell themselves to get by
There is no retreat
From the wars over these misunderstood moralities
So where do we go from here?
Do we go howling into the night
Holding on to all our spite
Nurturing every ounce of pain
Until it becomes everything?
I don't have the answers
I've just lived much of life in the waiting room of death
One day it may dawn upon you, a harrowing revelation
Oh, how helpless they are, all the things that can hurt you
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3. |
Ressentiment (Hamartia)
02:00
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Wake up. What am I to do today?
How do I fill the hours of a life
Where I don't feel capable of doing anything at all?
Wake up. How am I to feel today?
How do I escape the agonizing narratives
That kept me up til sunrise?
I stare into the eyes of a distant hope and it says “hold on”
I cant control the world, I can only control if I hold on
Everything, it hurts right now, but I need to, I need to
I need to hold on
Wake up, I am useless
That is all you want from me, to dissolve completely into
Nothingness, nothing at all
And I know that this is no better
Breaking rules, attempts to feel less scattered
Opposite directions take me
I never learned to learn without failing
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4. |
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It's never been easy to break free of everything lost
Through horrible circumstances and the ways we cope
Was it really my fault?
Or was it something in between that and reality?
I'm hard on myself, but maybe I don't know
Let's backtrack, how did you react? How would you react now?
Could progress be measured by anything else?
Blanket statements on the inside
Breaking my own heart
The only way I know how to fall apart
I feel something entering
The void inside my hope
But these defense mechanisms will never help me cope
But I see the future in the faces of the people that still let me in
Despite the darkness that engulfs us all
Through a world that doesn't care
Everything that it destroys
All the systems we enforce that destroy
And even though I've been destroyed, I am still worthy of love
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5. |
Sentiment (Anagnorisis)
02:47
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People either add to the chaos or they add to the hope
People either add to the despair or they add to the empathy
But the reality is that we all add to all four
Probably a lot more evenly than we'd ever like to admit
You are a human, you have a future
Don't let anybody tell you that you'll find the
Answers in the gutter now
That place where good health goes to die
The place where everyone validates your right
To hate what you don't understand
It can be boundless, your compassion
It can be endless, your ability to grow
The world, yes it is on fire
And the toilets are overflowing throughout the house
But you can take this problem and aim it at the other
And then maybe you're one inch closer to truth
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6. |
Hoppla, We're Alive!
02:15
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I hope today will be okay
I hope today will be fine
When we stare into the past
We always think the past will stare back
But like staring at the sun
The truth is you'll only go blind
Holy notes lie to
Unreliable narrators
What's to be gathered from this loss
Except an emptiness and grief
Why am I so accustom to
Losing grasp on everything?
I know today will be okay
I know today will be fine
Because the future
Well it stares at me with wide open eyes
Burning through the darkness
That consumed all of my
Empty answers to
Questions that I never asked
The only thing I know for sure is that
Everybody is afraid and lost
Failing at fulfilling their needs and wants
The world wasn't organized to make any of us healthy
There is nothing more ordinary than all of this dysfunction
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7. |
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On the dawn of the day when my life ends
I'll make my way down to the kitchen
And work on scrambling an egg
On the dawn of the day when I will die
I'll tell a stupid joke to my mother
And surely she will sigh
I've been left alone for far too long
Community has always eluded me
So I've wallowed in my inner sad song
At the end of my life, I'll be sick to my stomach
Cause no matter how cruel this world's been to me
I know I'll find reasons to miss it
So I'm glad I haven't yet been found dead
Cause that was never guaranteed to me
Whether it be by my own hand
Or the ruthless hand of the powers that be
I see a distant hell
When I stare into the eyes of my past self
But there is only here and now
On the eve of the day when it cuts to black
I'll crawl out of bed at midnight
And eat some disgusting prepackaged snacks
On the eve of the day when I disappear
I'll read a short story to my cousin's kids
And hope they can live lives with less fear
At the end of my life, I'll bury my brain
Within memories of all the art I love
Reflections of beautiful humanity
I won't be afraid to go
I've long since given up any sense of control
I'll just know I never knew anything at all
At the end of the dawn of the final day
I'll say goodbye to the people I grew to love
But there will still be endless words left to say
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8. |
.
05:15
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Human Kitten Portland, Oregon
acoustic songs about isolation, crisis, pain, growth, & learning to be alive after years of anticipating death
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